To Him we shall return.

 إِنَّا للهِ وَإِنَّـا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعونَ 

It all happened in a spur. I was home alone and fast asleep at eight in the morning when the phone rang. I didn't wanna get out of bed.

It's my off day. Let me sleep. I'm single and I have no one important looking for me. It must be some insurance company

, I thought. That was when I got a whatsapp spam from my mum with the message that my uncle was pronounced dead an hour ago.

I sprung out of bed immediately and switched my laptop on. Two hours later, we were at the airport on the next flight to Kuala Lumpur. It was my first time booking a flight on such short notice and it was also my first family death out of the twenty three years of my life - overwhelming was an understatement, but my feelings aside, I was more concerned with how my relatives were handling it.

My uncle was a good man. A father, a mentor, a man with a big post with a big company in Malaysia, always travelling and always with his family. He never spoke a lot but he was always there. Everyone around him relied on him, and he held a lot of responsibilities but he never failed to deliver results, every single time. Just look at his four children, they are all scholars.

I expected my aunt to be bawling her eyes out but she stayed composed as my mum hugged her when we arrived. 

What can I do? Allah wanted it this way. He's in a better place

, she said. I could hear her voice quiver every time someone asks how she was, but never once did she crumble or break down and cry. Maybe in silence or in solitary, but to be able to remain strong in front of all her relatives and children, in that moment, I knew it was pure strength that I witnessed.

إِنَّا للهِ وَإِنَّـا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعونَ

From him we came, to him we shall return.